campin4kids
Indiana
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My 11 and 14 year old girls went behind my back and created Myspace accounts after they asked me and I said not until they were older. Obviously I found out about it this morning when I over heard the 11 year old talking to a neighbor girl about pictures and buddies. I think the accounts were created at said neighbor girls house.
We have been planning a Halloween/Birthday Party for 14 yr old on Friday and there is Trick or Treating Saturday. Do any of you think these things should be involved in the punishment. What do you think is appropriate?
Feeling bad
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tvman44
Southwest Louisiana
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Sounds appropriate.
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campin4kids
Indiana
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BTW, Said 14 year old got straight A's on her report card. And 11 year old did well also. If you think that makes a difference.
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Code2High
Ridgecrest, CA
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Wow, that's a toughie. Halloween being such a huge kid holiday and a birthday party, well... On the other hand, when you're grounded, you're grounded, and I assume they've got at least a couple weeks' sentence? Engaging in not only not allowed but expressly forbidden activities in cyberspace is a huge no-no and a safety issue. That is one area where rules really must be enforced. I think I'd have to say... they blew it, and all festivities are off until they are off restriction.
susan
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whimstock
Beautiful El Paso, Texas
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campin4kids wrote:BTW, Said 14 year old got straight A's on her report card. And 11 year old did well also. If you think that makes a difference.
I think the Birthday/Halloween punishment is too harsh...they sound like good kids.
Surely, you can come up with something else. 
I realize the MySpace thing is your decision. On the other hand, 14 seems old enough to participate, provided you have access to the page.
You will likely have "bigger battles" to handle along the way, and it might be wiser to back off a bit here and use this situation for some thoughtful communication with the girls.
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ridingfamily4
Corona, CA
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My son was not allowed to have a myspace. He created one behind my back too. He was grounded from all videos games, mp3 player, computers (except for homework) and TV. I explained that if he could not use electronics within our guidelines, he could not use them at all.
on edit: his myspace acct was deleted and I signed up for one myself so I could check periodically to make sure he didn't come up with another (which he didn't)
* This post was
edited 10/28/09 04:49pm by ridingfamily4 *
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sharrlan
chino,ca
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ridingfamily4 wrote:My son was not allowed to have a myspace. He created one behind my back too. He was grounded from all videos games, mp3 player, computers (except for homework) and TV. I explained that if he could not use electronics within our guidelines, he could not use them at all.
Wise decision.
Since the bd party is in a couple of days, it wouldn't be right to cancel it now. I would definitely take away all electronics though. When my granddaughter acts up, I stick my hand out, she knows to round everything up and put it in my bedroom. She's allowed to use her iPOD during pe when they run, not if Grandma has it.
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Galvorien52
On The Road Again
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I'm sure you explained why you felt that they were too young to have a page but at that age they think nothing bad can ever happen to them. Deleting the page is a good first step...talking to the other girl's mother about what happened so they don't get a second chance to do it with her help would also be useful. Even kids who are generally good have the occasional stab at rebellion, esp when so many of their friends are doing it! Since they don't otherwise give you grief don't go overboard on the restrictions but make sure it's something that they will definitely miss.
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The Texan
Summer: Cascade, Idaho - Winter: A Warm Climate
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ridingfamily4 wrote:My son was not allowed to have a myspace. He created one behind my back too. He was grounded from all videos games, mp3 player, computers (except for homework) and TV. I explained that if he could not use electronics within our guidelines, he could not use them at all. I like this approach much better than the party or Halloween idea. Kids live in the electronic world today and if you sever that cord for awhile, it will have more of an impact. Also, go on myspace and delete their accounts.
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MrsCowboy
Hesperia, CA
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Wow... tough one, I am glad I am not in your shoes(though I have been more than once - I have 3, a 13 YO boy, a 10 YO boy and a 6 YO girl).
The "Mommy" in me wants to say, take away all computer/electronic priviledges and let it be. However, the "MOM" in me wants to say grounded is grounded and that includes all such activities this weekend. I have had to make that choice with one of my boys before and I hated to do it to him, but he had to learn a lesson.
I think the fact that the girls asked, were told explicitly no and then did it anyway is a fairly serious offense, IMHO. they knowingly did this behind your back, and if not properly punished, it could lead to them deciding that the "punishment" was worth trying that/or something worse again. Just something else to think about....
Robin - wife to Richard (D37, Int V625) and mom to Tyler (D37 C138), Shawn and Samantha
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