sharrlan
chino,ca
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Joined: 05/07/2004
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When did it become acceptable adult behavior to negotiate with 3 year old terrorists?
I love my grandkids, but the parental negotiation with these little terrorists is exhausting.
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Head'n Out
Wisconsin
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Joined: 03/03/2004
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The name of their organization is called "Al Kidda"..... 
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Doug4.7
Hartselle, AL, USA
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Joined: 10/02/2003
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It depends on what is meant by "negotiating" with the 3 year old terrorists. When we had our infestation of such persons in our house (it was a few years ago, now they are teen terrorists), we would negotiate some things. Usually it was along the lines of spelling out rewards for good behaviors and punishments for bad behaviors. It seems our kids/terrorists learned that there was a narrow window of opportunity to get their way and if they did not concede points quickly, they got nothing (the nuclear option).
Even now (as teens), they will try to negotiate with us on things. I don't see that as a problem as long as the negotiations do not drag on (and they know it).
But, of course, each kid is different and your mileage may vary.
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Galvorien52
On The Road Again
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I'm with Doug! Spell things out for them - of course you have to repeat yourself several times because they are kids and their attention span is zilch - and then stand your ground!
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Kajtek1
CA
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Joined: 12/04/2002
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THEY TOOK IT AFTER SOMEONE?
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The Texan
Summer: Cascade, Idaho - Winter: A Warm Climate
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Kajtek1 wrote:THEY TOOK IT AFTER SOMEONE? Yep, and with our Grandchildren it is the pre school that allows such behavior and then they bring it home. Momma and Grandma went to the preschool and explained that allowing such behavior was not acceptable and the children would be changing schools, if the school allowed it to continue. Problem solved, as the schools are hurting for clients in today's economy.
Bob & Betsy - USN Ret'd '78 & FL LEO Ret'd '03 & FT Class of 2002
'05 HR Endeavor 40PRQ, 400 Cummins -With-'05 GMC Sierra SLT, CC, Z-71, the pusher & our '07 Arctic Cat 500A & '08 Suzuki KQ 400A, riding in the pusher.
Where the wheels are stopped
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Nascarcruzin
Home is where the RV is parked.
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The children are the boss, in some households.
Ronnie & Rebecca
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sharrlan
chino,ca
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Kajtek1 wrote:THEY TOOK IT AFTER SOMEONE?
Not me, I come from the old school of thought, I am the mommy, that's why.
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Deb and Ed M
SW MI, USA
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Joined: 06/07/2004
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Doug4.7 wrote:It seems our kids/terrorists learned that there was a narrow window of opportunity to get their way and if they did not concede points quickly, they got nothing (the nuclear option).
LOL!!! We sure have the same parenting style!!!!
Regarding the 2 and 3 yr old terrorists/grandkids in MY family - there IS no negotiating with them - it's their way or the highway.
I keep reminding my kids (the parents of these two) that "Grandchildren are God's gift to us for not killing our children".....
But with patience and persistence, that awful phase passes. My Grandson, now 7, who was the three year old from the Very Hot Place - is now the sweetest, most thoughtful and helpful guy!!!
Deb
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Doug4.7
Hartselle, AL, USA
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Deb and Ed M wrote:Doug4.7 wrote:It seems our kids/terrorists learned that there was a narrow window of opportunity to get their way and if they did not concede points quickly, they got nothing (the nuclear option).
LOL!!! We sure have the same parenting style!!!!
Regarding the 2 and 3 yr old terrorists/grandkids in MY family - there IS no negotiating with them - it's their way or the highway.
I keep reminding my kids (the parents of these two) that "Grandchildren are God's gift to us for not killing our children".....
But with patience and persistence, that awful phase passes. My Grandson, now 7, who was the three year old from the Very Hot Place - is now the sweetest, most thoughtful and helpful guy!!!
Deb We have three kids spaced about 2 years apart. That facilitated negotiations between the kids over chores and other things. So many times now, we just tell "the group" that some task (or series of tasks) need to be done. They work it among themselves who does what. The kicker is if ONE complains to the authorities (that is, us), the kids lose their negotiating freedom and we decide who does what. That makes for spirited (and quick) negotiations over who gets to do what and when.
It is fun to watch/listen to the negotiations....
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