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 > Question regarding posting on Facebook about person's death

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Crowe

Billerica, MA USA

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Posted: 01/08/18 06:17am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Not an obit per se but my MIL is not well and it has occurred to a few of us that we have no contact info for many relatives and friends of the family. Many are on Facebook and would be easy to tag. Would you consider it in poor taste to notify people that we haven't had contact in for a while this way? My thought process would be to post a "I am so sorry to have to post such sad news" type of message. Thanks.


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PawPaw_n_Gram

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Posted: 01/08/18 06:28am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

When my dad died just over two years ago, I made the FB post about 18 hours later, the first thing the next morning.

Started with

“We are sorry that we haven’t been able to reach everyone by phone, but yesterday, Nov ??, our father ___________ passed away peacefully in his home at a he age of 90..”

FB is a common method to use to reach extended family and friends.


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wa8yxm

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Posted: 01/08/18 07:52am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I see messages like it often on Facebook.. When My Wife died my daughter posted such a message.

The key is how it is worded. And that is one area where I am not comfortable giving advice.. but look about and you will see examples.. Some good some stark.

Fact: There are several instances where my knowledge of physiology has provided the answer to a question... However. I'm always the most surprised when that happens because I truly do not have any credits in that field.. When it comes to discussing emotions.. I tend toward the academic, not the emotional.


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navegator

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Posted: 01/08/18 09:01am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Smoke signals, drums and the Telegraph are finally dead!

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bguy

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Posted: 01/08/18 09:29am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Don't announce the death, rather tag them to call for important news regarding their relative.


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FLgator01

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Posted: 01/08/18 04:04pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I see no problems with posting a death on FB. I would ensure close relatives and friends were notified by phone or in person before posting.

Deb and Ed M

SW MI & Space Coast, FL USA

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Posted: 01/09/18 02:46pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

FLgator01 wrote:

I see no problems with posting a death on FB. I would ensure close relatives and friends were notified by phone or in person before posting.


I agree with this. I've seen notices that were gently worded - not as many people received newspapers as in bygone days, so this is a good way to get the word out.

PawPaw_n_Gram

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Posted: 01/09/18 05:20pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

One change that has occurred in the world over the past 20 years is that our circle of friends has expanded.

I keep better track of my high school classmates with FB than even the few who stayed in our hometown did before.

When my mother died in 2008, my sisters best friend in high school, someone with a close relationship with our mother at the time, didn’t even learn that our mom had passed until she saw my FB post about Dad in 2015.

My sister and her friend had drifted apart in the 30+ years since high school.

One of my classmates who is now retired and lives a couple states away made the 500+ mile trip to be at Dad’s funeral. We kids, and most if not all of our friends, never knew that as a senior management trainee with the paper mill, he had spent six weeks shadowing our father, an hourly maintenance worker. The mill manager thought he needs to learn what it really takes to keep a paper mill running.

He developed a respect for and appreciation for our father as a worker and a mentor. Something we likely would never have learned if we had not mad the FB post.

We kids are at the age where many of our high school friends are losing parents, some spouses, an unfortunate few adult children. More than one has expressed appreciation for many thoughtful comments. We are realizing how much we have in common, and how petty were most of our disagreements 47 years ago

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