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 > Spouse left behind after death at a Campsite, what to do?

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DCS7

Pardeeville

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Posted: 09/18/21 06:15am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

This happened to me. We had just arrived to our winter destination in a new RV. He survived a month before passing. I had to try and figure out repairs to the RV, taking care of two dogs and visiting the hospital for hours a day. Then cremation and going back home to Wisconsin in winter, 1500 miles away. I can truly say, God provides, because I found people to help in various ways. My stepson had flown out and stayed with me and helped to drive the RV back. I do wish I had done more of the tasks so I was comfortable with them. I am still rving in a smaller RV but I haven’t tackled towing.

Scottiemom

Florida

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Posted: 09/18/21 06:29am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

This happened to me last October. My DH and I fulltimed for 15 years in our 40' Phaeton towing our Ford Flex. We have a home now in Florida but were visiting our daughter in Charlottesville, VA. My husband had had serious heart problems for the past 22 years. He died while we were in Virginia of complications caused by one particular medicine he had been on for those 22 years. He was in the hospital at UVA when he died. He had always wanted to be cremated. My daughter was with me and our son flew up the next day from Florida. They went with me to the cremation society and we made arranngements for my DH. I stayed in the campground until I had his ashes back. Terry always handled the outside jobs, but I knew how to do everything. I dumped the tanks, filled the freshwater tank for the trip back home. For the past ten years, I had been the sole driver, due to his heart problems. The morning I left, the campground owner helped me hook the car up. I knew how to do it, but it was a 2-person job. He listened carefully to my instructions and we easily hooked up. I had made reservations at stops along the way so I had a pull-through every night so I didn't have to unhook/rehook the toad, although I could have. I strapped his urn into the navigator's seat and we drove back home to Florida. I talked to him all the way. When I got home, I emptied the big moho, cleaned it up and within 6 weeks of DH's passing, she was sold and on her way home with her new owner. I kept our small B+ motorhome which is in terrific shape and have been camping in it. At the present time I am in Indiana visiting with my Mom who had a stroke last week and camped in my sister's woods with 30 amp and water.

We bought a MASA plan years ago, but I didn't use them to get back home since I knew how to drive my rig. My kids may have to use it for me!

I had no problems doing what needed to be done, but I'm sure not everyone would have been able to. The big plus is I could drive my Phaeton anywhere and we always kept her in excellent condition. My DH did all the routine maintenance/batteries/tires, etc., and that I did not want to do. My little one is 22' and she gets me where I want to go and then some. I'm not towing anymore either. I joined a women's RV club and have been camping with the Florida chapter. I wasn't ready to give up the lifestyle. Although I'm not fulltiming, I've traveled about 7,000 miles this summer.

I miss my DH terribly, but I cannot sit and mourn forever. He wouldn't have wanted that. And at 71, I still have things I wanna do and places I wanna see.

Dale


Dale Pace
Widow of Terry (Teacher's Pet)

2014 Ford Flex
2004 R-Vision Trail-lite 213 (MinnieMee)
Fulltimed for 15 years, now living in Florida

http://www.skoolzoutforever.blogspot.com/
Where are we?


jdb7566

minnesota

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Posted: 09/18/21 06:34am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I personally know a couple that if camping, were Rob to suddenly drop from a heart attack, Kelly would likely follow, from the very thought of not knowing what to do next. She rules the roost, but he handles all the details. Like others have said, it is wise to have a "just in case" plan.

ferndaleflyer

everywhere

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Posted: 09/18/21 07:48am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I posted before but this also happened to me. A lady posted on here she needed someone to drive her 45ft DP towing a 24ft enclosed trailer from CA to FL. Had a whole bunch of BS offers + people wanting a fortune to do it. I contacted her and agreed to do it just for expenses. She made all the arrangements, I flew out, took 3 days to get back to FL. I started flying back home and got stranded in Charlotte 2 days by a snowstorm. Her husband had died in CA. I never heard from her after.

Lwiddis

Near DVNP, California

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Posted: 09/18/21 08:13am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I agree with Don…cross training of all those camping with you.


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Deb and Ed M

SW MI & Space Coast, FL USA

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Posted: 09/18/21 09:24am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Tvov wrote:

My wife knows how to do everything and has watched me... but reading this makes me realize she's never really done everything on her own.

We are usually plenty busy with our "jobs" arriving and leaving a campsite. I keep thinking that I should have her do more with the hitching and towing, but I usually forget until after everything is done.


In my case, it was the opposite - I did all the "chores" of getting ready to go. Ed watched, his was the foot that held down the sewer hose...LOL! But I'm a "list maker" - I had a list of all the things that needed to be done to leave camp - and it was taped inside one of the kitchen cabinets. Ed would have been able to follow it, if I had been incapacitated.

And something I did a few years ago: we were headed from Michigan to FL to spend the winter - and since Ed needed cataract surgery anyway, I asked to do the entire drive by myself, just to prove to myself that I could manage 1300 miles in 2 days. It turns out that I really LOVE the long drives - I've done them ever since.

winnietrey

seattle

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Posted: 09/18/21 11:08am Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Came home a couple of years ago, to find my DW dead in the driveway. Totally unexpected.

So from experience, you might consider, have a list of contact numbers in the rig, for friends, family, kids, relatives. And make sure one of those has the same list. Call one that has the list. I am pretty sure one of those would be on their way to you in a matter of hours.

You will not be in much shape to make any decisions, they will help.

Also a detailed hook up and drive list, so anyone, even if not familiar with your rig, can get it underway.

As for the rest, who knows? Pretty hard to make concrete plans, depends on to many factors.

Biggest thing is getting a loved one by your side, you will not want to be alone, that is guaranteed.

Desert Captain

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Posted: 09/18/21 01:05pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

While most of this thread has been about someone dying the situation need not be of a fatal nature to require some serious assistance. A simple fracture or other non life threatening injury/illness can easily render the primary driver incapable of getting the rig home. Also remember your pet{s} as most of us consider them family.

Those who have family and or friends that can drop everything and arrive prepared and capable of driving what for many are very large rigs with toads and trailers are very fortunate. This is not the case for me and even if I had someone that is a very big "ask".

For several years we have carried the Good Sam Trip interruption coverage {no, it is not insurance} but does provide for a professional to drive the rig home to include a spouse, kids and pets. There are a lot of other services folded in and the yearly cost is around $125 +/- or basically a nice steakhouse meal for two. Much like fire extinguishers, ERS and full coverage this plan is something I hope to never need but my bride and I sleep better knowing that it is in place.

We came very close to needing it last month... I was recovering from a kidney stone and while on the mend I elected to cancel an upcoming 3 day trip to a remote CG about 80 miles from home. On what would have been our first night in camp I was struck down with serious liver - gaul bladder failures and after being rushed to the local ER spent the next 7 days hospitalized going through gaul bladder removal surgery and several other serious medical procedures {don't ask}. Between the kidney stone and the subsequent, albeit unrelated medical disasters the running total from the VA is now well north of $100,000.

We would have had our 24' Class C, 10' cargo trailer and Can Am Spyder to get home none of which my bride could have handled alone. There is no one I could have called {not that I was in any shape to do so} and we would have relied on the Trip Interruption coverage.

Just sayin...

[emoticon]





dedmiston

The West

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Posted: 09/18/21 01:10pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

I deleted a snotty post. Please be kind.

* This post was edited 09/18/21 05:19pm by dedmiston *


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ferndaleflyer

everywhere

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Posted: 09/18/21 03:41pm Link  |  Quote  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Since my post is gone I suppose you thought something was wrong with my helping a woman in distress without thinking she had an ulterior motive. Why don't you PM me with what was wrong with my post?

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